So, we’re making war in the Middle East again, eh?

I know that people complain about Obama spending too much time playing golf, but right about now, I wouldn’t mind if he went back to golfing instead of this. After all, one of the naive reasons for my vote for him was that he would be pulling us out of military entanglements.

Hell, with how useful our politicians have been lately, go ahead and put them all on the golf course. They’ll accomplish more there. The Republicans love shutting the government down and don’t want to do a damn thing, so it’s the perfect place for them. It’ll make me happy if I can turn on my TV one fine Sunday morning and see them all doing what they do best, putting around on the green. I won’t spend any time watching them, though–golf bores the living shit out of me.

Yes, but if that happens, who will do the real job of governing? Simple–leave big business and the military industry in charge. We already know they’re the ones running the country.

Funny how the politics business works these days. President Obama’s tenure isn’t even over yet, but there’s already a committee planning the Obama presidential library, with places such as Chicago, New York and Hawaii competing to be the location for it. And, as with anything else involving this President, there’s already controversy. Political leaders in Chicago were proposing to offer a $100 million down payment to lure the library foundation to their city, but other locals are asking why tax money should be contributed to this project.

Here’s a simple idea for saving tax and donation money. There’s already a George W. Bush presidential library in Texas. Why not just blend the two together into a state-of-the-art Bushbama Republicrat Library & Museum? Imagine: on the soothing green of the library grounds, we could gaze at a monument to the glorious military-industrial complex, including a sculpture honoring the Unknown Job Creators. Inside, we could attend educational exhibits on topics such as the importance of continuing to be embroiled in the Middle East (and of keeping Guantanamo open), why health care services are better when there is a profit motive involved, and of course a water feature displaying the delicate process by which stock market gains will one day trickle down to the rest of us. (That one takes a little patience.)

Doesn’t that sound delightful? And hell, why wait? Let’s tack on a Hillary Clinton wing right now.

See? Even a progressive like me can come up with good budget-cutting ideas.

If so, then that makes me very happy.

Oregonians are an independent bunch and we don’t take too kindly to out of state big money trying to come in and influence our elections. It appears the Koch brothers found our local Senate race between incumbent Jeff Merkley and Republican challenger Monica Wehby to be of interest to them. Over a million dollars has been spent on anti-Merkley ads by one of those shady PACs with a patriotic euphemism for a name–this one called Freedom Partners. No surprise here–it turns out the board of directors for Freedom Partners includes high-ranking executives with Koch Industries. The ads slammed Merkley for his support of Obamacare and the fact that he voted to raise the debt ceiling.

Well, the latest news is that Freedom Partners will probably be giving up their funding of the anti-Merkley campaign in October. Most likely because it hasn’t worked, the race isn’t any closer, and people in Oregon will continue to vote Democratic.

Good. This is a deep blue state, Kochs. Get the hell away from it and don’t let the door hit you on the ass too hard on your way out. If the Koch brothers consider Oregon a hopeless case, then that gives me another reason to be proud of my home.

For those of you who are impatient to read it, here is a preliminary summary of WorldNetDaily contributor’s Aaron Klein’s upcoming book about Benghazi. Sounds exciting:

They make an unusual pair. He’s the Kenyan-born jihadi, with such radical acts of terrorism in his past as signing people up for health insurance and wearing a beige suit to news briefings. She’s the former First Lady, still haunted by memories of a killing spree of her political opponents, both in Arkansas and Washington D.C. Together, they will set off on a journey of transforming this nation into a Communist-Fascist-Muslim dictatorship, and their nefarious plan to hand the Libyan embassy into the hands of this country’s enemies is only the beginning.

But across the heartland, a scattered band of brave talk radio listeners is tracking their every move. Now that their guns have been confiscated, will they be able to fight off these progressive villains using only their supply of survival seeds and homemade water filtering systems? Will they be able to save America from its imminent demise? Or will a talking lizard crawl out from underneath a sun-drenched rock and tell WorldNetDaily readers: “Hey man, you’re obviously high on something and you’re hallucinating all of this. Don’t eat the purple mushrooms next time”?

Stay tuned.

Ah, the scent of children’s tears and crushed dreams is in the air–must be time to go back to school.

I remember how much I dreaded this time of year when I was little. I knew I could look forward to spending my days getting mocked by my old Communist teacher, who hated my family for not being Communist, and attacked by my Catholic schoolmates, who hated my family for not being Catholic. After long, blissful months of drawing, reading and flying off on imaginary adventures, I had to slouch back into the building where everything I was and liked would get stomped on as “weird” and “stupid”.

Later on, my school experiences in places other than my mind-stifling Polish hometown were much better, so much so that I would look forward to September. Positive teachers and welcoming classrooms made all the difference. So this year, I’m wishing all the kids going back to school a place which expands their imagination and desire for knowledge rather than squashing it. A place which is considerate of students with different religious and political beliefs. And may the butterflies they feel be ones of excitement, not of anxiety and fear. School should not be a scary destination.

I enjoy writing a check for a good cause sometimes. But now I’m confused. Why is it that in order to donate to the charity of my choice, I have to have a bucket of ice water dumped on my head?

I might have this wrong, but I think that at first, you had to accept the ice bucket challenge and if you didn’t, you’d have to donate more money to make up for it. Which kind of makes sense. Now it’s turned into a free for all with people donating and then getting hit with the contents of the ice bucket for entertainment purposes. In Poland, we have a holiday for this sort of thing on Easter Monday called Smigus Dyngus. Every year, people chase each other around with buckets of water, and nobody donates a damn thing. I guess we all like the thought of drenching each other, and just need an excuse to do it.

However, the ice bucket challenge is still a bit murky to me. As someone who takes hot showers even in the middle of summer, I will need this clarified for me before I go anywhere near that icy water.

Another day, another heartwarming Internet meme. This time, it’s the story of over 300 Starbucks customers “paying it forward” and picking up the tab of the next person in line. Nice thing to do? Sure. But it also feels like a distraction. Yes, we can get all mushy about regular people buying each other a coffee. What about some bigger ways of paying it forward?

In the past few years, corporations in this country have made stunning, record-breaking profits. They have made those profits thanks to our very hard work. And they are not paying any of that forward–if anything, they’re doing the opposite. Worker wages, during that same time, have gone down. Likewise, our government representatives are not paying us forward for the votes and loyalty they have received from us. But I suppose that when it comes to the politicians, they have much bigger financial favors to pay back, and those business transactions have nothing to do with us, their constituents.

Americans are truly some of the most generous people I’ve ever met. We also come off looking like chumps sometimes, getting fleeced on every side by powerful interests, and not standing up and speaking out about it like we should. We work harder than any other nation in the world, and are working ever harder all the time, yet getting less and less in return.

Perhaps this serves to reveal the true “Secret” of the Universe, which is that it has a dark sense of humor, and that it does not, in fact, reward kindness with kindness. Good deeds are more likely to be punished, and assholes will always thrive. I guess one answer is to do as most spiritual traditions of the world tell us to do–don’t expect to be compensated for the love you give to others–give it anyway. Unfortunately, I have a handicap–I’m not capable of being a heartless asshole–so I don’t have much choice in the matter.

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 160 other followers