Living on an alien planet can be difficult sometimes. It requires work and effort. Every afternoon, I turn on the news and try to figure out what is going on around here.
The news anchor swivels his eyestalks as he lectures his audience. “On our planet, we believe in having as much freedom as possible,” he explains. “That’s why the clerk in Kentucky is keeping same sex couples from getting married…she’s doing it in the name of freedom.”
Okay, so that makes no sense. But hey, different lifeforms and all that, right? And what kind of strange name is Kentucky, anyway?
I keep watching, but it doesn’t get any better. An interviewer shifts herself and her low-cut dress towards the camera, so that we can more clearly see the cleavage of her five breasts. “Ooooh, is that really your answer?” she chirps. “You wouldn’t terminate your female partner’s pregnancy even if it meant ending her life? You would watch her die?”
“Oh, certainly! I will always stand in defense of life.”
“Well, blirpity blorpity, Senator!” she giggles.
This is becoming hopeless. Now, snippets from a press conference. A truly strange creature with a bizarre growth on its head leans into the microphones.
“The Latinos love me!” it yells. “The Mexicans, they love me! Just last week, I gave one of them a $10 tip, and he said to me…”
Is there no intelligence to be found out here?
It’s almost a relief to see the televangelist lifeform flail its tentacles up to the sky. “He’s coming back!” it screeches. “He’s coming back and when He does, everyone who didn’t listen to my warning will get TOSSED into the lake of fire!”
The lake of fire sounds preferable to this insanity…I hope I get tossed in there soon. To borrow a phrase from this crazy tribe, amen.
eurobrat 
09/15/2015 at 1:27 pm
It is difficult to find intelligent life out there.
09/15/2015 at 1:34 pm
Yeah…I think I may have overdosed on the Trump coverage this week.
09/15/2015 at 1:39 pm
Easy to do.
09/15/2015 at 4:22 pm
Kentucky needs a pastor that will tell Kim to hand out marriage licenses. She needs a pep talk.
09/16/2015 at 4:04 pm
Or at least to let her deputy clerks hand them out! Is that too much to ask?
09/16/2015 at 11:10 am
Yeah, I only just heard about this, but it’s all so mind-boggling to anyone with a still-functioning mind….All 37 of us.
In this case, this idiot destroyed her own best argument and did so in a way that made her own argument a good argument against her. For what it’s worth, her best argument is this:
“I was (somehow) elected to this office BEFORE the rules changed. I cannot morally support these new rules, so I’m not going to personally issue those licences.”
It’s principled and somewhat logical. She won’t do the task, but will leave it to her underlings. While I disagree with her on the issue, I understand that approach to a radical change you can’t get behind.
Except that she ordered all her underlings to do the same. She decided that HER personal convictions were going to supersede those of everyone else working there and force them to do something that might be against THEIR convictions…which is exactly what she was trying to protest against. But she wasn’t just working at an office/cake-shop she owned. She was a manager at a government office doing government business. She was using her government position to deny what the Supreme Court determined was the law of the land. But “upholding the law of the land” is part of what her job entails…pronouncing something legal according to “the law of the land”.
So, there’s some major, multi-tiered, hypocrisy right off the bat. All moral/logical high-ground lost. But then we find out this woman doesn’t remotely practice what she preaches. (affairs, divorces, etc, etc.) She’s making a mockery of marriage while holding a government office hostage to moral principles she herself doesn’t practice.
And yet she’s become a fucking hero…to hypocrites everywhere! I’m sure her following is bigger than just the homophobes. I’m sure there are lots of people who don’t care either way about homosexuality, but are defending her out of some urge to “circle the wagons” around a person’s right to be a loud mouth hypocrite.
Anyway, this whole thing gives me a George Wallace flashback. Wallace was a Governor of Alabama who famously used HIS government position (and his own body) to block people from access to government services recently granted to them by the federal government (blacks going to schools). He called it “protecting our rights” too. He became a villain to the tolerant and a hero to the intolerant. And he wound up having FAR more political impact than almost anyone realizes.
Wallace ran for President in 1968 as a 3rd party Segregationist candidate. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/George_Wallace_presidential_campaign,_1968
This racist won 5 states as a 3rd party candidate!!! Repeat: WON 5 states as a 3rd party candidate! Not only that, he finished a close 2nd in 3 other states and a close 3rd in a few more. (He’d have actually done better if he didn’t chose the unpopular VP candidate that he did.) Also of note, Wallace did fairly well among young males & Blue Collar workers outside the South. Or what we would later call “Reagan Democrats”.
Wallace proved that the fledging strategy generated by Nixon’s people, The Southern Strategy, would work. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Southern_strategy
If a 3rd party guy with NO resources can do THAT well with such overt racism, imagine what a major party can do with its resources and a more “nuanced” racist message. This strategy would soon become the Republican’s bread & butter right up until today…and the foreseeable future.
This story gives me a flashback because another Southern Governor is going to run for President and he’s declaring the denial of government services a moral crusade. Huckabee’s appeal already shared the same geography as Wallace’s. Now he’s recasting himself as a modern Wallace by dressing up bigotry as a “fight for religious liberty”.
I almost can’t wait until it’s 2016, so I can pay attention to the 2016 election. Because this could be a case of history repeating itself because we, as usual, forget to learn our lessons. One thing for sure, Republicans are NOT giving up on The Southern Strategy anytime soon.
It’s a “till death do they part” thing. 🙂
09/16/2015 at 4:25 pm
Yep, that’s exactly what pisses me off so much about the Kim Davis situation. I guess I can buy the idea of her not issuing the licenses herself due to her personal beliefs (although I also feel that if I’ve been selling my soul to corporate America for going on 10+ years now, then everybody else can suck it up and do their job too) but the fact that she won’t let the deputy clerks issue the goddamn licenses… This isn’t about her “religious freedom”. She doesn’t want the couples to be able to get married, and she will forcibly stop everyone around her from performing the county’s services as required by law.
Oh, and in case you didn’t hear, Kimmie was “saved” about 4 years ago, after all of her divorces and re-marriages already happened, so at that point God wiped her slate clean with His magic cleaning liquid and now she gets to be as much of a bitch to everyone else as she wants to be! Isn’t that wonderful?
I forget who exactly said this, but Kim was being compared to Rosa Parks (ROFLMAO) and someone correctly noted that no, she’s not Rosa Parks in this situation–she’s George Wallace. Huckabee, seeing as he’s one of the passengers in the clown car desperately trying to get the public’s attention, is milking the Kim Davis thing for all he’s worth.
But if you want to see where racism will get you in this election, all you have to do is look at the GOP frontrunner, the Donald…although as I’ve noted in my post above, there are Mexican waiters who love him…so he can’t be a racist, right?
09/17/2015 at 2:08 pm
Hey, there were slaves who loved their masters, too. Some of them even consented to it.
“I forget who exactly said this, but Kim was being compared to Rosa Parks and someone correctly noted that no, she’s not Rosa Parks in this situation–she’s George Wallace. Huckabee, seeing as he’s one of the passengers in the clown car desperately trying to get the public’s attention, is milking the Kim Davis thing for all he’s worth” – Eurobrat.… which is nothing -Sedate Me
It was me, in the comment you’re responding to, Ms ADD. (Hehe). No, I heard comedians (Nightly Show and/or Bill Maher?) making it too. But I saw George Wallace the very 1st second I heard this.
But, I would never make the absolutely ludicrous Rosa Parks comparison. Even with the bigotry taken out of the equation, it’s a horrible comparison. Rosa Parks wasn’t a government official who got arrested for protesting a change she didn’t like to a government policy that didn’t impact her rights. Rosa Parks was an ordinary citizen who refused to obey an existing law that negatively impacted her every single day, not because of a career choice, but an “accident of birth”. Except for “taking a stand & getting arrested”, Davis is the complete opposite of Rosa Parks. Even the end result is different. Rosa got things changed. Davis failed to get things changed back.
The impact is all wrong. Blacks couldn’t sit there & gays couldn’t get licences there. Blacks can now sit there & gays can now get licences there. But bus riding racists were still free to ride the bus. Bigoted Christians are as free to get licences there as ever. Their rights have not been tampered with at all! Hell, the bus bigots actually had more to complain about. They had to share seats with people they hated. Bigoted licence getters probably won’t even see another couple (gay or straight) when they get their licence. They’ll never even notice a change.
In fact, they are still free to hold their bigoted opinions…and have them expressed on FOX Noise. The only thing Davis lost was the “right” to stop other people from doing what she had the right to do….and abuse…until her “saving” occurred.
The biggest difference between this and what George Wallace did is that at least George Wallace took the stand himself! He was actually on the front lines in some of the chaos. Mike Huckabee is retroactively co-opting this woman’s stand. He’s trying to claim the credit himself and incorporate it into his own Presidential bid. To me, it makes makes the bigotry even MORE distasteful than it already is. At least Wallace’s bigotry and political run was organic. For all I know, Huckabee’s bigotry is purely a political ploy.
This is how cynical things have become. You can’t even trust a bigot’s bigotry anymore!
09/18/2015 at 8:10 pm
Yeah, literally all Huckabee did was grab Kim’s hand and shake it to Eye of the Tiger. And I think the result was that his polling went up from 2% to 3%….
09/24/2015 at 11:29 am
I heard one candidate farted at an event and his numbers tripled to 2%.
I took a poll of my dogs and asked them who’d they would vote for…and the winner was Benji in the most adorable landslide ever!
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Higgins_%28dog%29
Damn, I loved Benji.
My (pounded into the ground) point is that all this poll watching is completely meaningless bullshit. None of these tired old nags have even entered the starting gate (Iowa) yet. And most of them won’t. Nothing that happens before 2016 will matter at all.
Look at last time. If I recall, Every single candidate had their turn at the top before January 2012. This even included a black man & a woman….in the Republican Party! But what did they accomplish? Sweet fuck all. The Black Stallion (wearing number 999) dropped dead while still in the pre-race walking circle and The Minnesota Filly collapsed in the starting gate of Iowa and put herself down.
I recently looked it up and Bachmann (Turner Underdrive) only got about twice the votes in the entire state of Iowa that I did the last time I ran for my podunk Town Council…and lost miserably.
(My sacred vow of no 2016 until 2016 continues unabated!!!)
09/24/2015 at 7:48 pm
Except for your commentary here, of course…which seems at least tangentially related to 2016 😉
Either one of your dogs would make a more acceptable Presidential candidate than Donald Trump…sadly, I suspect they were both born in Canada?
And yes, I do realize that what is happening in the polls right now won’t matter very much by the time Nov 2016 rolls around…unless Trump surprises us all and remains in the frontrunner spot (shudder).
09/25/2015 at 9:51 am
As I’ve said before, Trump never had ANY intention of actually running. This show pony just wanted to strut around the pre-race walking circle, flashing his mane. Although I try to avoid it, talking about him in no way violates my 2016 abstinence vow. He does NOT want the job, just the notoriety of running for it. Unfortunately, he’s “winning” this race that won’t start for another 4 months. So he’s having a hard time figuring a way to leave and still claim victory…but he will.
Note: Canuckistan’s longest national election since 1900 will have taken less time from beginning to end than there is between now & January 2016
Except for your commentary here, of course…which seems at least tangentially related to 2016
Nice try! But tangential is as close as I’m getting. (ie what “oral” is to an abstinence vow) I’ve been sticking to historical examples to provide context and non-specific discussions of it as a concept. All I really know about 2016 is:
– the actual Presidential vote is STILL over a year away.
– lots of candidates intend to run. I can even name some, but half will drop out before a single vote is cast in the 1st primary. So, why bother?
– despite not starting yet, there’s already been more time, money & attention dedicated to it than an entire Presidential election deserves.
But this Kim Davis story is mildly newsworthy in it’s own right. Unfortunately, it’s been engulfed by the gigantic blob that is the 2016 pre-game hype. It’s an excellent example of why this entire process is so toxic to the system.
“Either one of your dogs would make a more acceptable Presidential candidate than Donald Trump…sadly, I suspect they were both born in Canada?”
So was Ted Cruz. (Once again, I apologize for him on behalf of all Canadians.) How he can run is beyond me.
Yes. Not only would either of my dogs make a better President than Trump, they might make a better President than Obama. He’s more of a lapdog than they are. Mind you, one of them has a “Clintonian weakness” if you catch my drift. So, he should be kept away from interns.
However, was born in the USA and could run…if he was still alive…and I could vote. Damn, I loved that dog!
09/25/2015 at 9:54 am
That should read: “However Benji was born in the USA….”
09/25/2015 at 7:22 pm
No need to apologize for Ted Cruz…he may have been born in Canada, but he’s ALL Texas.
It will be interesting to see what method Trump uses to exit the race.
And, 2016 hype or no 2016 hype, I have certainly been paying attention to Kim Davis…her story is one that particularly gets under my skin.